nobody home

Feeling kind of apathetic, kind of dismal. I'm in a foggy funk. I want out.

I've got wild staring eyes. And I've got a strong urge to fly. But I got nowhere to fly to.

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face paint, waterfalls, oh my.

I had such a fabulous weekend. My husband and I went to the Renaissance Fair on Saturday while my mother-in-law so kindly watched the baby. The weather couldn't have been friendlier - sunshine and slight breezes. I had my face painted with fantasy swirls to match my necklace and tank top. We shared a sundae, saw pirates, rode in ship swing buckets and laughed.
On our drive home, we stopped off at High Falls for a few pictures since it was getting late and the park would close soon. But it was enough to steal a few hugs and take in the sheer beauty of the green grass, evening wind and calming sound of a rushing waterfall.
I'm totally thankful for my weekend off work, I need to plan more of these. I feel revitalized.

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a poisonous sweet sixteen

My niece, Brit, turned 16 yesterday. Her 'wow' surprise from me was a Bret Micheals cake. Granted, Brit (sadly!) doesn't know a single word to a Poison song, but thanks to VH1's reality TV, she fell in love with Bret this past season by watching "Rock of Love". I also realize he's like forty-something and she's sixteen but she's only going to turn sixteen once, plus I'm the coolest aunt ever. So.. I had to also live vicariously through her and do the whole get-super-excited-thing and plan and do a rock star cake. It came out so seriously awesome, and she loved it.
We had a great time last night filled with Target clearance racks, Chinese food, and yummy cake. I can't believe how grown up she is. I am truly thankful for her.

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people are strange

I've just gotta say, I do not want random strangers knocking at my door. This makes me edgy, uncomfortable, and nervous. I hear a knock and instantly get this horrible image of masked men barraging into my house and attacking me. So when I get a random Jehovah's witness or a Mormon knocking on my doors on Sundays, I freak. I still freak, even though it's probably a nice lady with a pamphlet in her hand on a mission.
Oh, or how about when the guys pull up in their old pick-ups asking to mow my lawn? Want to talk about creepy? Because peeping out my blinds all I see is the middle-aged scruffy creepy man? I don't like it! Stay away unless I ask for your help - please, please. I'm a paranoid bird. You people make me cringe. Call me unwelcoming, inhospitable. Call me irrational and paranoid. I suppose I am all of those adjectives. That's just me.

Today is Mother's Day - lots of love to all of the mommies (and everyone else!)
I had to work an all-night shift last night, then again tonight. Boo! I have to give my gratitude to the great stockers though, who wished me a Happy Mommy's Day as soon as the clock struck midnight. I work with a few really good guys.

I got to spend a few hours with my little buster this morning before taking him to my mother in law's place so I can nap. There's nothing like cuddling in bed with him after we've both just woken up. We're like two birds in a nest, keeping warm and close. I'm so glad I'm his mommy.

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zombie talk

When I am sleep-deprived, every sensation is heightened. I can feel my heart beat, my every breath, the way my eyelids feel when I blink. If I didn't know better, I'd think I could feel my hair growing.

It's really comforting when your "close friend" bails on you to babysit for tomorrow by not returning phone calls all week long. Wow! Nice to know I can't count on family or friends now. Yip Yip. Let's hope for the second week in a row, that my boss doesn't notice that I switch my schedule up the day of.

When I'm really tired like this, sometimes I lay on my back on our giant bean bag counting ceiling cracks to see how long I can keep my eyes open. It's astounding how long sleepy eyes can stay wide open.

I know I sound like a mad woman. I feel a little bit like one, too.

Tomorrow will be day number two of working an all-night shift, coming home, getting about an hour of shut-eye, then tending to a needy, Jekyll and Hyde two year old for eight and a half hours until I can finally dive into my bed, stuff plugs in my ears and sleep for a mere shitty five to six hours- only to do it again
.
Anyone up for coming and kidnapping me? I'll pay you in.. hugs and chai tea.

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